Tuesday, November 29, 2016

Win a Baby

(this is what our video looks like)

Hey everyone! As most of you know, Dave and I have been unable to make a baby in the past 8 years of our marriage. Infertility has been a constant struggle, and such an incredibly hard trial. About a month ago I heard about a contest on our local radio station 97.1 ZHT They are giving away a baby! Well, they're giving away IVF (in vitro fertilization). It's the process used to help couples with infertility issues, be able to get pregnant and have a child. The whole process is worth $25,000!!  You heard that right! They're giving 1 lucky couple the chance to be parents!

As I'm sure you've guessed, the reason for this post is to ask for your help. We had to make a 4 min. video asking for people to vote for us, so that we could win the opportunity to be parents. Dave and I both know that we're not anymore deserving of becoming parents, than any other couple in this contest. Every one of them deserve this gift. We're just hoping that after you watch our video, you'll find it in your hearts to vote for us.

To vote, you click on this LINKThen, scroll through the videos (because I don't have a direct link) and look for the video that looks like the picture above. After you watch, simply click vote, and you're done! ONE THING though. You can only vote ONCE from ONE EMAIL. If you vote more than once, we will be disqualified. They have to keep this fair for everyone, so we ask that you only vote once from one email address. Other than that, you're good to go!

We can't tell you how much we'd appreciate your help, in helping us create our forever family. We have so much love to give, and want to share that love with a little baby. We'd be eternally grateful for your help in bringing baby Strasburg to us.

Thank you for all your love, and all your incredible support over the years. We're so lucky to have each of you in our lives. Thank you for taking the time to watch our video and vote for us. Have a wonderful Holiday Season from our family to yours!

Jilly and Dave 

Saturday, October 8, 2016

It's Real

Before I married Dave, most of you know that I was inactive in my church for 11 years. During that time I committed a lot of sins by my church standards. I didn't feel like I was living up to my potential, and I knew I could do better. I was searching for a way to change my life and be happy again. Something I didn't think possible. That's when Dave came into my life.

8 years later, and I'm still so grateful that I took the opportunity to come back to the church. When I made that decision, I had to repent for many things. I had to make peace with my past, and my Heavenly Father. The only way I could do this, is by using the atonement of Jesus Christ.

I'll never forget getting on my knees for the first time in years and asking for forgiveness. It was something I had never done. I had never actually asked my Heavenly Father to forgive me of my sins. It was a very humbling, and a remorseful moment for me. It changed into something beautiful though.

A few months after getting on my knees that first time, I was getting interviewed for my temple recommend, so I could marry my eternal companion in the house of the Lord. I was sitting across from my bishop when a beautiful feeling I had never experienced before, washed over me. It brought me to tears. I didn't know what to say and I didn't know what was going on. That amazing Bishop looked at me and said, "Can you feel that? That's the Holy Ghost confirming to you that you're worthy to enter God's temple." It was one of the most amazing moments of my life. I knew right then that I wanted that feeling to continue, and that I would follow it's promptings as long as my Father allowed me to experience it.

Over the next few years I found out what the atonement truly can do. As I continued to live my life, and live the best way that I knew how, I started to realize that my past sins were washing from my mind. I could no longer recall many of the experiences that I had repented about. I didn't feel shame, or guilt, anymore. I was finding peace within myself and learning the love of my Savior. I was allowing myself to truly take advantage of the greatest gift any of us have ever been given. The atonement of our Savior.

As life progressed, I noticed more and more that my mind wasn't filled with my past sins, but it also wasn't causing me pain for the sins that had been committed against me by others. I was able to forgive them whether they asked for it or not. I was able to let go, and truly move on. The peace and comfort this brought was something I hadn't experienced. I had no idea that the atonement could heal my heart from the pain brought on by the mistakes of others. It was amazing.

The last thing the atonement did for me, was take away the pains of mortality regarding my mental illness; Bi-polar 1 disorder. I noticed over time that I was no longer feeling empty when I would be manic or depressed. Even though my moods didn't stop, and I still battled those dark days, I was learning to appreciate my illness. I was learning to be more patient with others and myself. I was more empathetic, kind, and compassionate, to those that suffer from mental illness. I was also finally able to thank my Heavenly Father for making my brain, a Bi-polar brain. It makes me the Jilly that I love. It allows me a different way of thinking and helps me to be more aware of those around me. Because of the atonement, I can finally say that I'm grateful for this disease and the power to learn how to work with it.

The atonement is the greatest gift ever given to us. It's the power that will allow us to one day return to a loving Father in Heaven. It's the only way we will get to be in his presence again, and there's nothing greater than that. Because our Savior loved us enough to give his life for us, we are able to have all the gifts that God can give. That's simply amazing to me.

I now understand a bit better what the atonement is and that it works for everyone, members and nonmembers alike. All you have to do is simply believe that your Savior can heal you. He can heal you from your own mistakes, the pains caused by others, and even the pains of mortality. Life will be easier, and more beautiful if you will make Jesus Christ apart of your life.Whether you're apart of my religion or not. Christ is for all of us.

The atonement is real. I'm living proof that your sins may be scarlet, but they can turn white as snow, and they can even be forgotten. I promise to each of you, that if you ask for his grace to come upon you and turn your heart to him, your life will change in ways you can't imagine possible. I know this, because that's exactly what happened to me. I promise it can happen to you too.

Monday, August 15, 2016

I'm a Sinner

I'm not one of those people that hides their sins from the world. I live by the code that no one can use anything against me because most of the time, I've already shared it. I feel as though we need people to be real and talk about their faults, mistakes, screw ups, and fails. It's the way we relate to each other, and find that we can lean on one another. Admitting that you're not perfect all the time is one of the greatest things about being human. Let's face it, I'm a sinner and I'm proud of it.

In my religion we have a strict code of conduct. There are things you can do and things you're not supposed to do. Drinking coffee, not swearing, being nice, not being vain, etc. These are some things that are extremely difficult for me, and I'm not embarrassed to say it. I make mistakes every day and these are just a few.

I'm the girl that has an unhealthy addiction to the delicious little black drink. Coffee. From the time I was 11 years old, I would drink the stuff every day with my aunt and grandma. It was disgusting at first, but like most things, I learned to love it. Over the years as I left the church, I didn't care that I drank it. It wasn't until I came back to the church that I realized I had to try harder. I do now. I try a lot harder than I ever have. You know what though, I still have a cup of coffee 1 or 2 times a month. I go into Starbucks, smell the delicious aroma, and realize why I love this place. I'll order a cup, and know that it's okay. It's okay because I'm a sinner. I admit it, I acknowledge it, and I love it. The world is not going to tumble down because Jill had a coffee.

Swearing. If you know anything about me, you know that I cuss like a sailor. It's one of my hardest habits to break. I just love to swear. You just can't empathize somethings without a good 'ol swear word. Every time I cross the line and use one a bit too harsh, I make a goal to not screw up again. Guess what though, I inevitably screw up again. I screw up because I'm a sinner. It's okay. I know I am, and it's just fine.

I'm not always nice to people. I have a bitchy attitude sometimes and I act like a brat. I'm not always on my best behavior. There are days when I'm running late and I don't want to have to put forth any extra effort. There are days when I curse people around me, get frustrated by ignorant people, and curse the ground that some people walk on. Most days I'm nice Jill, and can love the world, but sometimes I'm just not. It's okay. You're not a bad person because you're not nice all the time. You're human. Reality sucks at times but it doesn't mean God hates you, or me.

Being vain. WOW! I suck at this more than anything. Being vain is my number one greatest fault. I love to have name brand purses. I love to have expensive shoes that people know are expensive. I love the nice cars, big houses, cute expensive jeans, and the food from the best restaurants. Being vain though, I love to show it off. I love to take pictures of all my worldly goodies so that I can have people "like" it. It's awful, I know. Since we're being real though, this is real life for me. It's the number 1 sin that I work on more than any other. I have to remember what's important in this life, and remind myself that it's not money. It's incredibly hard, but it's true.

I was reading in the bible with Dave yesterday when I came across St Matthew 9:13-17. It talks about how Jesus goes to the sinners, not the saints. This is the reason I'm writing this post. Church is for sinners. Jesus is for sinners. Believing is for sinners.

When I left the church at age 14, I left because I was sinning and didn't think I was worthy of being there. Over the years I have heard the same thing from lots of people that have left. They didn't keep going because they weren't worthy to go. I wish I could go back and tell them that they're more worthy than anyone! Church is for SINNERS. If it was for perfect people, we wouldn't need to go to church. We wouldn't need to be taught about our Savior, his atonement, or his sacrifice for us. We would simply live and magically return to our Father in Heaven one day. That's not reality. If you sin, you need church. Whatever church that may be it doesn't matter, but  you need to know your Father in Heaven loves you regardless if you sin or not.

I know I'm not perfect. I know people judge me all the time, and talk crap behind my back. I slip and swear in my Sunday school class, and my kids just laugh at me. I always make sure to tell them to not be like me though. It's all okay though. I know I sin. I also know my Savior loves me. If he loves me with all of my faults, all of my sins, all my mistakes, and missteps, he loves you too. He doesn't want you to feel alone or left out. He wants to show you that he loves you, and that church is for everyone. Sinners and Non-Sinners alike. We all need Christ in our lives. 

So go on and sin. Don't beat yourself up about your mistakes. Simply try a little harder tomorrow, and keep going. You've got this even when you don't think you do. I promise you're not alone with your sins. We all have them, even if some are better at hiding them than others.